One thing that I am afraid of is raising ungrateful children. I want them to be sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, to be empathetic and to realize there is more beyond their universe besides themselves. I think recognizing someone has gone out of their way to do something for them is not innate- it has to be learned, which is the hard part. How do we teach them gratitude??
Children learn by our example, so just by saying please and thank you in every day situations- like "Thanks for that hug! It made me feel great!" Insist on them using the words too- good manners and gratitude go hand in hand!
Work gratitude into your daily conversations. "We're so lucky to have a good dog like Clancy!" or "It makes me so happy when you listen!" Having a "thanking" part of the day is a good way to turn up the gratitude. Saying what good things happened during the day over dinner, or making bedtime prayers part of your nightly routine.
Have the kids help. I am soo guilty of this. I will ask my daughter to help with something and it takes her sooo long I end up doing it myself. This is only going to make her appreciate my efforts less. (Don't you feel more empathy for people who work outside on cold days when you've been outside shoveling the snow?) Just by having them do simple everyday chores like feeding the dog or setting the table will make them realize it takes effort for these things to be done.
Find a goodwill project. You don't have to drag your toddler down to the soup kitchen every Saturday, but find something that they understand. Help them make cupcakes for a sick neighbor, and as you are stirring the batter, talk to them about how they are for a special person, and how happy that person will be when they receive them.
Encourage generosity. Frequently donating toys and clothes to your local goodwill will show that there are kids less fortunate than they are.
Insist on thank- you notes. My mom was always a stickler on this and I'm grateful she was. For birthdays, Christmas or whatever she would always have us write thank- you notes. This is something I want to instill in my kids. I think just doing it will make them feel good. For the proper way to write a thank you, check out this post I did earlier in the year here.
Practice saying no. Kids are constantly asking for candy, toys and games often! By not giving in to their every whim, it makes it when you say "yes" all that much sweeter.
Here are a few activities to do on your family night on gratitude:
Make a "Gratitude Attitude Calendar" and put it in the kitchen and ask your kids to contribute one thing they are grateful for each day.
Play a game to find the hidden blessings in each situation.
Let each child be a "Tude" for a day, and let everyone say why they are grateful for them. Who ever has the red plate at dinner is the "Tude." You can get it on Amazon for $32.95
Attitude of Gratitude Building Exercise
1. Take 2 sheets of paper, and make 3 equal columns on each. Give each child 2 sheets.
2. Label the first page "MY LIFE LIST." The columns should be labeled: WHAT I WANT, WHAT I NEED and HOW LUCKY I AM. Discuss the difference between wants and needs. Ask the children to fill in the columns.
3. Ask each child to create another LIFE LIST with the same labeled columns on page two. In completing the second Life List, the children should imagine that they are facing a life challenge such as homelessness or illness. If you are doing this exercise with more than two children, assign them each a "challenge." One child will be homeless, another child will have just moved and has no friends, another will have cancer, etc.
4. Ask the child to imagine- WHAT I WANT, WHAT I NEED, and HOW LUCKY I AM, under those circumstances and list the answers under the columns.
5. Ask the children to compare the second Life List of wants, needs, and luck with their own needs.
6. Ask the following questions:
What can we learn from the perspective of the other child?
What does he/she need from us?
Finally, ask your children to go back to their own lucky list and expand it based on what they learned by imagining they were facing a life challenge.
To lighten the mood, pull out these great Pumpkin Chocolate Chip cookies that they helped make earlier!
My adorable friend Jenn gave me this super easy and yummy recipe- thanks Jenn!!
Ingredients:
1 box of Spiced Cake Mix
1 15 oz can of Libby's Pumpkin
1 cup (or more:) of chocolate chips
Directions:
With a mixer, beat together the cake mix and pumpkin. Add the chocolate chips and bake at 350 degrees for 12 min. Makes a ton!
7 comments:
Thank you for this post! My twins are only 15 months old, but I have been thinking a lot about how to teach them to be grateful lately. This is super helpful.
I love those cookies for this time of year. I have already made them 3 times this season. So easy and sooooo good!
So glad I stumbled upon your blog... This post is so perfect and I found so much inspiration from it. My husband and I were just talking about being careful not to raise entitled kids. I have this plate hanging in the kitchen and we use it for birthdays, but I love your suggestion. Thanks for sharing all of this!
I cannot imagine that you could raise ungreatful children. You are so thoughtful!
I love this lesson...seriously doing it with the kiddies! Good work, and I love that first picture too!
Great ideas and tips, thanks! That is one of my fears too and I really need to be better at teaching them.
Thanks for the post, no matter the age this works with all kids:)
I have this same recipe and it is yummy. This is the only pumpkin cookie recipe that makes the cookies nice and fluffy, and OMG how eaaaaasy is that????
Great post... Thanks for all the tips, with all the things available to kids these days, it is really hard not to raise kids that think the world belongs to them.
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